Last blog of January '08. I look back at all God has allowed me to accomplish and it's just like...WOW. I look at where some of my friends are and it's just like....WOW. God's definitely raising up a generation that will obey, that will trust, that will love, that will honor. A generation who will not imitate the actions of the previous generations but will stand up for truth. That's encouraging, really encouraging.
This blog is not one where I have anything specific to speak on. I just want to write...and everytime I get this feeling, I write because I remember a time not too long ago when I didn't have the desire to write a sentence or phrase. I've just been having some random thoughts today....and I have to be careful with that because when I think too much, I become too analytical. I already know being analytical and being a radical for Christ don't mix...it's like water and oil. This is because as you begin to take on the mind and the ways of Christ, many things you may do will probably not make sense to the human mind. So, with that being said, I was thinking. And I was thinking about this surge of writing that I've had lately. And I began to doubt certain things like...maybe I use too many scriptural references, and maybe mine are always too long, and what if people think I'm trying to be "too deep". And then I had to stop and think....how can you use too many scriptural references?? The Word of God is what we consult for everyday things and to know how to please God. How can you talk about God and the things of God without using the Word of God?? OK. Second thing, maybe they're a bit long. This may be true (sorry, I can't help it). They're definitely not your Bible verse of the day or your Daily Bread Reading. It may take awhile to read them....but is that enough for me to shorten what I feel led to say??? My conclusion was no. OK. Third thing, what if people think I'm trying to be "too deep". Look friend (these thoughts were all directed to myself), truth is truth...if truth is too deep for some people who call themselves believers, maybe they should reevaluate where they are with Christ. I'm not saying (at all) that my words are the be all, end all but they are God inspired. Bottom line is: sometimes people don't want to hear (read) things because it brings about conviction (II Timothy 3). OK.
Now, nothing necessarily spurred these thoughts on but that's just the person I am, I think TOO much. I think for the world. I think until I become insecure. MAJOR character flaw....I know. One thing that I have to realize, and this goes back to the principle of my "Whatchu Lookin' At?" blog is that I have the right to be secure in who I am in Christ. I have the right to have confidence in Him and Him alone. "So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what He has promised." --Hebrews 10:35-36. It's hard to be confident when you look at what you have/are. It's harder to be confident when you look at what others have/are. This further illustrates the point that if we look to Jesus, we have no need to worry about our confidence wavering. He is our confidence. He is our security. Insecurity has no place in the lives of believers. Ok...just had to get that in me.
In other news, God willing, I will be starting a Bible Study over here. Bless God! It started as an idea which I knew had to be greater than myself because I would have never, EVER started a Bible Study at home. I talked to a few people around here and they want it to happen, which is so encouraging. I have to continue to be prayerful about it to make sure that this is really something that God wants me to do. But I'm excited! So (if anyone reads this), please keep me in your prayers! I need them! :) I want the Gospel (the Good News) of Jesus Christ to be shared with people. I want people to experience how GREAT our God really is. I've come to the conclusion that the Gospel is still enough....aside from all the things people do to get people to hear the Gospel, it STILL has that drawing power all by itself. Thank God that I don't believe in something with diminishing value but appreciating value. Something that's SECURE. Top flight security!
Another blog for the people. Keep the faith.
"And since we have a great priest over the house of God, let us draw near to God with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith, having our heart sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water. Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for He who promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on towards love and good deeds." --Hebrews 10:21-24
Phileo love,
Ash B.
Thursday, January 31, 2008
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
Low Down Dirty Shame...
"So then each of us will give an account of himself to God." --Romans 14:12
Ok...so I know I'm not the only one who this bothers so I won't go on and on about it. Please don't mistake my uneasiness about our (we, the believers) comfortability with living in sin as judgment. But I feel that the topics begs to be discussed (as it has been). God has called us to do better and live better. This requirement has no title on it, no special positions attached to it, it's not just for church leaders and choir members; it's for everyone. We are called to be imitators of Christ (Ephesians 5), ambassadors for Christ (II Corinthians 5). So if this is the case, which I'm assuming we all know it is (otherwise I think we've missed the point of salvation) then why do we, as believers, live such sloppy lives? Now it's is true that all have sin and have fallen short of the glory of God (Romans 3). But the Bible also says in Romans 6, shall we continue in sin that grace may abound? GOD FORBID.
I'm amazed everyday when I look at some of my friend's profiles on facebook and myspace. The saints are flickin' people off in their pictures. People have one sentence about God in their religious views section and then when you scroll down to their favorite quotes, you see every curse word you've heard (putting stars or dashes in stead of letters is no better, your intent is still clear). Or you have the people who love to throw around the phrase "Only God Can Judge Me". Even though these people are absolutely correct, they have NO CLUE (I don't think) what this means. The Bible says that "For the time is come for judgment to begin with the family of God; and if it begins with us, what will the outcome be for those who do not obey the gospel of God? And 'If it is hard for the righteous to be saved, what will become of the ungodly and the sinner?'"--I Peter 4:16-17.
And so if this be the case, then why are we living lives that are super shameful to the name of Christ? In my life, I've acted a monkey many times. If you catch me the right way now, I still might. The struggle against the flesh and the spirit is ever present. We know that. We know that it is a continual process. The Apostle Paul summed it up the best (to me), in Philippians 3:12, "Not that I have already obtained all this (as described in the previous verses), or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ took hold of me." This means it'll be a day-by-day thing. God does not call us to be perfect...true. But He calls us to a live HOLY. I believe that word is so misused in the Church nowadays. Holy isn't flipping over pews and speaking in tongues. Holy isn't rolling your eyes to the back of your head and being laid out on some church's floor for hours. Holy isn't even being in every ministry and committee in your church. Those things might be alright but are no indication of where your heart is in relation to God. Anyone can dance. Anyone can roll their tongue if they practice hard enough. Anyone can go to church and for various reasons not having to do with God. Anyone can cry during a church service if they think about life long enough. Emotions don't move God. Holiness (conducting yourself in a way that's PLEASING to the Lord, setting yourself apart and dedicating yourself to use by God, distinguishing yourself from the ways of the world for the sake of Christ) moves God. Our conduct moves Him. Our sincere and contrite hearts (Psalm 51:16-17) move Him. Peace among the Brethren (other believers) move Him. RELATIONSHIP with Him moves Him. It's time to walk worthy of the calling, friends. How can we who call ourselves the beloved of God, not even know what it takes to satisfy Him? I mean, that is one of things we're called to do. That's like me getting a boyfriend and endearing myself to him without knowing what makes him happy and also what grieves him. Let's not grieve the Holy Spirit with our conduct as Ephesians 4 warns us about. Let's make a concerted effort to number one--truly get to know God (not just know of Him, but know Him and know His character), number two--know what He requires of us and what He offers to us, and number three--let's be a people of change. Talk is always fine but it takes a bigger person to take action that will bring about permanent results.
"As obedient children, do not conform to the evil desires you had when you lived in ignorance. But just as He who called you is Holy, so be holy in all you do; for it is written: "Be holy, because I am Holy." --I Peter 1:15-16
We (not just y'all...I am in NO WAY exempt from this) have got to do better. FOR HIS NAME SAKE. Let's be the difference.
Phileo Love,
Ash B.
Ok...so I know I'm not the only one who this bothers so I won't go on and on about it. Please don't mistake my uneasiness about our (we, the believers) comfortability with living in sin as judgment. But I feel that the topics begs to be discussed (as it has been). God has called us to do better and live better. This requirement has no title on it, no special positions attached to it, it's not just for church leaders and choir members; it's for everyone. We are called to be imitators of Christ (Ephesians 5), ambassadors for Christ (II Corinthians 5). So if this is the case, which I'm assuming we all know it is (otherwise I think we've missed the point of salvation) then why do we, as believers, live such sloppy lives? Now it's is true that all have sin and have fallen short of the glory of God (Romans 3). But the Bible also says in Romans 6, shall we continue in sin that grace may abound? GOD FORBID.
I'm amazed everyday when I look at some of my friend's profiles on facebook and myspace. The saints are flickin' people off in their pictures. People have one sentence about God in their religious views section and then when you scroll down to their favorite quotes, you see every curse word you've heard (putting stars or dashes in stead of letters is no better, your intent is still clear). Or you have the people who love to throw around the phrase "Only God Can Judge Me". Even though these people are absolutely correct, they have NO CLUE (I don't think) what this means. The Bible says that "For the time is come for judgment to begin with the family of God; and if it begins with us, what will the outcome be for those who do not obey the gospel of God? And 'If it is hard for the righteous to be saved, what will become of the ungodly and the sinner?'"--I Peter 4:16-17.
And so if this be the case, then why are we living lives that are super shameful to the name of Christ? In my life, I've acted a monkey many times. If you catch me the right way now, I still might. The struggle against the flesh and the spirit is ever present. We know that. We know that it is a continual process. The Apostle Paul summed it up the best (to me), in Philippians 3:12, "Not that I have already obtained all this (as described in the previous verses), or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ took hold of me." This means it'll be a day-by-day thing. God does not call us to be perfect...true. But He calls us to a live HOLY. I believe that word is so misused in the Church nowadays. Holy isn't flipping over pews and speaking in tongues. Holy isn't rolling your eyes to the back of your head and being laid out on some church's floor for hours. Holy isn't even being in every ministry and committee in your church. Those things might be alright but are no indication of where your heart is in relation to God. Anyone can dance. Anyone can roll their tongue if they practice hard enough. Anyone can go to church and for various reasons not having to do with God. Anyone can cry during a church service if they think about life long enough. Emotions don't move God. Holiness (conducting yourself in a way that's PLEASING to the Lord, setting yourself apart and dedicating yourself to use by God, distinguishing yourself from the ways of the world for the sake of Christ) moves God. Our conduct moves Him. Our sincere and contrite hearts (Psalm 51:16-17) move Him. Peace among the Brethren (other believers) move Him. RELATIONSHIP with Him moves Him. It's time to walk worthy of the calling, friends. How can we who call ourselves the beloved of God, not even know what it takes to satisfy Him? I mean, that is one of things we're called to do. That's like me getting a boyfriend and endearing myself to him without knowing what makes him happy and also what grieves him. Let's not grieve the Holy Spirit with our conduct as Ephesians 4 warns us about. Let's make a concerted effort to number one--truly get to know God (not just know of Him, but know Him and know His character), number two--know what He requires of us and what He offers to us, and number three--let's be a people of change. Talk is always fine but it takes a bigger person to take action that will bring about permanent results.
"As obedient children, do not conform to the evil desires you had when you lived in ignorance. But just as He who called you is Holy, so be holy in all you do; for it is written: "Be holy, because I am Holy." --I Peter 1:15-16
We (not just y'all...I am in NO WAY exempt from this) have got to do better. FOR HIS NAME SAKE. Let's be the difference.
Phileo Love,
Ash B.
Monday, January 28, 2008
Whatchu Lookin' At? (Part 1)
Excuse the bad language of the title...it's just a common expression used that I think demonstrates the main point of this blog.
"My son, pay attention to what I say; listen close to my words. Do not let them out of your sight, keep them in within your heart.; for they are life to those that find them, and health to man's whole body. Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life. Put away perversity from your mouth; keep corrupt talk from your lips. LET YOUR EYES LOOK STRAIGHT AHEAD, FIX YOUR GAZE DIRECTLY BEFORE YOU." --Proverbs 4:20-25
This blog will be focused mainly on verse 25....part 2 will deal with verse 23.
When I was younger (around elementary, middle school age), I had a core group of friends. It was the four of us. We went to church together; Barbara and I went to the same school in 8th grade. Our parents worked in ministry together. You could say that we were the best of friends, for the most part. What is very interesting to me is how at least once a year, the four of us would have this big falling out. Usually, it would start by one person saying something negative about another person in the group, and then the person who was told the negative thing would run and tell someone else in the group. Of course, by the time it got back to the person, the story had been misconstrued, pieces added and missing. Long story but I promise it has a point. I can now truthfully admit that sometimes I was the one who started the mess. Most of the time, it was out of jealousy. You see, I was the only "dark-skinned" girl out of this group of four. The other 3 were at least of a caramel complexion and were very pretty (in my eyes). I always looked at them and wanted to be their complexion, or wanted something they had, or wanted to be liked by the boys who liked them. It was always something.
So you're probably asking what this has to do with anything. Well, one thing I know I still struggle with and I know many others struggle with also is looking at others. It's almost like an unspoken competition. Will I look "fly-er" than her in church on Sunday? Is she prettier than me? Will he like her more or me? Does he write better than me? Etc, etc, etc. The list never ends. If you're sitting here thinking to yourself that you've never had these thoughts or similar ones, you're lying. Be truthful with yourself. Why do we feel the need, friends, to constantly be looking at other people? We look at others in comparison, we look to others for validation, we look at others for ideas, we look at others to see what not to do. We're so absorbed in looking at others and what they're doing and we're too concerned in how others are looking at us. It's craziness. Recently, as God has been pouring back into me my desire to write, I have been looking at other people's writing (as I would assume any writer would do...simply for the love of it). And I find myself sometimes thinking, "Lord, I can't write as good as ________." or "I don't have as much eloquence as __________." And then God has to remind me, "So He said to me, This is the Word of the Lord unto Zerrubabel: 'Not by might nor by power, but by My Spirit.' says the Lord God Almighty." --Zechariah 4:6. Any gift, talent, or knowledge I have comes from God. It is not for me to give it a value, it's not for me to compare and contrast my gifts with others' gifts, it's simply for me to use whatever He's given to me to His glory. If people don't understand or appreciate your gift, that's ok. "Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand, that He may lift you up in due time." --I Peter 5:6. Whatever you do, follow the words of verse 25 of Proverbs 4, keep your eyes looking straight ahead. Don't look to see what BooBoo is doing....don't look to see what Pookie is wearing.....don't look to see how Pootah is writing. Just be concerned with what God has called you to do and who He's called you to be.
Last illustration (and I promise I'm done for today). I heard this from a preacher (I can't remember who. It might have been my Daddy. He says a lot of great things.). When horses race, the riders put blinders on the horses' eyes. The purpose of the blinders is so that the horses can't look to their sides, they can only look straight ahead to the course they're running. Since we, as Christians, are running a race, I would like to propose that we do the same thing. We should put on our spiritual blinders as we run the race. Only being able to look straight ahead keeps you from being easily distracted by things on the sidelines and who is gaining on you and what not. It allows you to be focused on the most important thing--the prize (Jesus Christ).
"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perserverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God." --Hebrews 12:1-2
Look at HIM. He's looking at you.
Phileo Love,
Ash B.
"My son, pay attention to what I say; listen close to my words. Do not let them out of your sight, keep them in within your heart.; for they are life to those that find them, and health to man's whole body. Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life. Put away perversity from your mouth; keep corrupt talk from your lips. LET YOUR EYES LOOK STRAIGHT AHEAD, FIX YOUR GAZE DIRECTLY BEFORE YOU." --Proverbs 4:20-25
This blog will be focused mainly on verse 25....part 2 will deal with verse 23.
When I was younger (around elementary, middle school age), I had a core group of friends. It was the four of us. We went to church together; Barbara and I went to the same school in 8th grade. Our parents worked in ministry together. You could say that we were the best of friends, for the most part. What is very interesting to me is how at least once a year, the four of us would have this big falling out. Usually, it would start by one person saying something negative about another person in the group, and then the person who was told the negative thing would run and tell someone else in the group. Of course, by the time it got back to the person, the story had been misconstrued, pieces added and missing. Long story but I promise it has a point. I can now truthfully admit that sometimes I was the one who started the mess. Most of the time, it was out of jealousy. You see, I was the only "dark-skinned" girl out of this group of four. The other 3 were at least of a caramel complexion and were very pretty (in my eyes). I always looked at them and wanted to be their complexion, or wanted something they had, or wanted to be liked by the boys who liked them. It was always something.
So you're probably asking what this has to do with anything. Well, one thing I know I still struggle with and I know many others struggle with also is looking at others. It's almost like an unspoken competition. Will I look "fly-er" than her in church on Sunday? Is she prettier than me? Will he like her more or me? Does he write better than me? Etc, etc, etc. The list never ends. If you're sitting here thinking to yourself that you've never had these thoughts or similar ones, you're lying. Be truthful with yourself. Why do we feel the need, friends, to constantly be looking at other people? We look at others in comparison, we look to others for validation, we look at others for ideas, we look at others to see what not to do. We're so absorbed in looking at others and what they're doing and we're too concerned in how others are looking at us. It's craziness. Recently, as God has been pouring back into me my desire to write, I have been looking at other people's writing (as I would assume any writer would do...simply for the love of it). And I find myself sometimes thinking, "Lord, I can't write as good as ________." or "I don't have as much eloquence as __________." And then God has to remind me, "So He said to me, This is the Word of the Lord unto Zerrubabel: 'Not by might nor by power, but by My Spirit.' says the Lord God Almighty." --Zechariah 4:6. Any gift, talent, or knowledge I have comes from God. It is not for me to give it a value, it's not for me to compare and contrast my gifts with others' gifts, it's simply for me to use whatever He's given to me to His glory. If people don't understand or appreciate your gift, that's ok. "Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand, that He may lift you up in due time." --I Peter 5:6. Whatever you do, follow the words of verse 25 of Proverbs 4, keep your eyes looking straight ahead. Don't look to see what BooBoo is doing....don't look to see what Pookie is wearing.....don't look to see how Pootah is writing. Just be concerned with what God has called you to do and who He's called you to be.
Last illustration (and I promise I'm done for today). I heard this from a preacher (I can't remember who. It might have been my Daddy. He says a lot of great things.). When horses race, the riders put blinders on the horses' eyes. The purpose of the blinders is so that the horses can't look to their sides, they can only look straight ahead to the course they're running. Since we, as Christians, are running a race, I would like to propose that we do the same thing. We should put on our spiritual blinders as we run the race. Only being able to look straight ahead keeps you from being easily distracted by things on the sidelines and who is gaining on you and what not. It allows you to be focused on the most important thing--the prize (Jesus Christ).
"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perserverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God." --Hebrews 12:1-2
Look at HIM. He's looking at you.
Phileo Love,
Ash B.
Saturday, January 26, 2008
RESTORATION
Before I start this blog, I have to give a BIG shoutout to God! You truly are "the Man"! The way you do things are so incredible....who can have a mind that complex?? The way you've had my words flowing has been amazing and it's because I see you more clearly everyday. Thanks for being ever so patient with me. I'm overjoyed, over love, over You!
Ok...so....RESTORATION (a blog of healing)
I can recall a time back in 2006 when my words caused me and my family some grief. Just to summarize, I was venting about certain situations that were happening at the time (that was a tough summer) and somehow some people in our church found out about it (I'm a PK...those things can never be good). Now, while I felt justified in doing so and nothing I said was a lie, it was not appropriate. I look back at that time and I still get this knot in my stomach. How could my words, which came out of a place of hurt and pain, be used against me and cause my family EVEN MORE pain than what we had already experienced that summer. I can't remember crying myself to sleep more in my life than that summer. So many things were going on. I felt like such a failure. I had picked up a significant amount of weight in that spring semester. I felt fat and sloppy. I felt I had no voice. I developed an anger problem. It was not pretty.
So why did I feel the need to share this? As God continues to breakdown this beautiful facade, He is taking me back to specific times in my life that may have helped build this facade. The summer of 2006 tried to shut my mouth. By that I mean, after the incident with my words, I didn't want to talk anymore. I stopped writing. I couldn't find the inspiration. Everything I wanted to say was still out of an area of hurt and pain. I could not flow. I struggled and I struggled. But slowly, God has been opening that door for me again. He is being gracious enough to grant me the ability to write again. It has nothing to do with me but it all has to do with His promises. He promised that I would be His mouthpiece, His ambassador. It will happen. It is happening. The struggle has not been in vain because I have learned dependence on God. He is teaching me how to use my words for His glory and not to vilify the things in my life that have gone completely sour. As for the things that bring me issues, He's taught me how to take those things to Him. And most importantly, He's taught me to open up my mouth and speak truth to the areas in my life where I've believed the devil's lies. So for me, this writing thing is serious. I haven't had urges to write like this since MIDDLE SCHOOL. I'm so excited! And I'm so glad that God doesn't give up on us when we give up on ourselves. He continues to complete the works He's called us to (Philippians 1:6).
Another thing that was wrong before was that I wrote almost always about bad experiences. If you look through my writings from high school and my freshman year of college, most of them are based on being hurt or not feeling adequate enough. It's almost like God stopped the flow in order to revamp it to what He'd have it to be. Sick!
I'm also excited because this morning was my first time being able to share the Gospel over here. People know that I'm a Christian and they know my daddy's a pastor, yada, yada but that doesn't mean anything if you're not living right. I was talking to a new friend here who is struggling with a sense of who she is and how she looks (which is a blessing because I've struggled with that for such a long time). She believes in God but she doesn't necessarily have a relationship with Him. God opened the door for me to be able to share with her my experience. She was so touched by the convo (it was on Skype) that she told me she was going to print it out and keep it in her journal. And even if she doesn't make a definitive decision to be sold out for God while we're over here in France, I pray that the conversation will serve as a seed out of which will grow a zeal for Jesus Christ. These are the moments I live for! Translating my experience with Jesus Christ into a real, life-changing decision for others. When I tell you that God is awesome, I wish there was a better word than awesome! I'm so glad that my words now have meaning. He's simply amazing and I could definitely sing of His love FOREVER.
Take this into consideration:
" As God's fellow workers we urge you not to receive God's grace in vain. For He says, 'In the time of my favor I heard you, and in the day of salvation I helped you.' I tell you now is the time of God's favor, now is the day of salvation." --II Corinthians 6:1-2
Phileo Love,
Ash B.
Ok...so....RESTORATION (a blog of healing)
I can recall a time back in 2006 when my words caused me and my family some grief. Just to summarize, I was venting about certain situations that were happening at the time (that was a tough summer) and somehow some people in our church found out about it (I'm a PK...those things can never be good). Now, while I felt justified in doing so and nothing I said was a lie, it was not appropriate. I look back at that time and I still get this knot in my stomach. How could my words, which came out of a place of hurt and pain, be used against me and cause my family EVEN MORE pain than what we had already experienced that summer. I can't remember crying myself to sleep more in my life than that summer. So many things were going on. I felt like such a failure. I had picked up a significant amount of weight in that spring semester. I felt fat and sloppy. I felt I had no voice. I developed an anger problem. It was not pretty.
So why did I feel the need to share this? As God continues to breakdown this beautiful facade, He is taking me back to specific times in my life that may have helped build this facade. The summer of 2006 tried to shut my mouth. By that I mean, after the incident with my words, I didn't want to talk anymore. I stopped writing. I couldn't find the inspiration. Everything I wanted to say was still out of an area of hurt and pain. I could not flow. I struggled and I struggled. But slowly, God has been opening that door for me again. He is being gracious enough to grant me the ability to write again. It has nothing to do with me but it all has to do with His promises. He promised that I would be His mouthpiece, His ambassador. It will happen. It is happening. The struggle has not been in vain because I have learned dependence on God. He is teaching me how to use my words for His glory and not to vilify the things in my life that have gone completely sour. As for the things that bring me issues, He's taught me how to take those things to Him. And most importantly, He's taught me to open up my mouth and speak truth to the areas in my life where I've believed the devil's lies. So for me, this writing thing is serious. I haven't had urges to write like this since MIDDLE SCHOOL. I'm so excited! And I'm so glad that God doesn't give up on us when we give up on ourselves. He continues to complete the works He's called us to (Philippians 1:6).
Another thing that was wrong before was that I wrote almost always about bad experiences. If you look through my writings from high school and my freshman year of college, most of them are based on being hurt or not feeling adequate enough. It's almost like God stopped the flow in order to revamp it to what He'd have it to be. Sick!
I'm also excited because this morning was my first time being able to share the Gospel over here. People know that I'm a Christian and they know my daddy's a pastor, yada, yada but that doesn't mean anything if you're not living right. I was talking to a new friend here who is struggling with a sense of who she is and how she looks (which is a blessing because I've struggled with that for such a long time). She believes in God but she doesn't necessarily have a relationship with Him. God opened the door for me to be able to share with her my experience. She was so touched by the convo (it was on Skype) that she told me she was going to print it out and keep it in her journal. And even if she doesn't make a definitive decision to be sold out for God while we're over here in France, I pray that the conversation will serve as a seed out of which will grow a zeal for Jesus Christ. These are the moments I live for! Translating my experience with Jesus Christ into a real, life-changing decision for others. When I tell you that God is awesome, I wish there was a better word than awesome! I'm so glad that my words now have meaning. He's simply amazing and I could definitely sing of His love FOREVER.
Take this into consideration:
" As God's fellow workers we urge you not to receive God's grace in vain. For He says, 'In the time of my favor I heard you, and in the day of salvation I helped you.' I tell you now is the time of God's favor, now is the day of salvation." --II Corinthians 6:1-2
Phileo Love,
Ash B.
Friday, January 25, 2008
PLAYED! (yet again...)
"Woe to him who quarrels with His Maker, to him who is but a a potsherd among potsherds on the ground. Does the clay say to the Potter, 'What are you making?' Does your work say, 'He has no hands'? Woe to him who says to his father, 'What have you begotten?' or to his mother, 'What have you brought to birth?'. This is what the Lord says--the Holy One of Israel, and its maker: Concerning the things to come, do you question me about my children, or give me orders about the work of my hands? It is I who made the earth and created mankind upon it. My own hands stretched out the heavens; I marshaled their starry hosts." --Isaiah 45:9-12
Ok...so this scripture (to me) speaks to one specific area in my life. I was roaming on myspace and came across this dude's page (he's my bf's cousin) but what was so amazing to me is that, I believe, he's only 17 and he's so on fire for God. He had verse 9 on his page and that struck a chord within me. First area: Self-esteem. Really...who am I to really question God about what He made and how He did so? He's the master creator and everything He did/ does is good...superior work...of the best quality. Therefore, what does that say about me? This is not a point to get cocky on but God wants each of us to realize how important we are. How when He made us, it was, indeed, good. This point has nothing to do with us but has all to do with WHO HE IS. Isn't that awesome? If He could create a whole universe, do you think He'd wait to get to you to mess up? Of course not! It's simply not in His character to make mistakes or else, He wouldn't be God. So for those of you, like myself, who struggle with this self-esteem thing, you have to learn how to see yourself the way that God sees you--precious. We're His workmanship, We're fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 119), and we're created in Christ Jesus to do good works (Ephesians 2:10). I understand it's a process. Take it one day at a time. Ask God to show you your worth, not for the sake of knowing it, but in order to truly understand how great He is for making someone as unique and different as you. You'd be amazed what He'll show you once you open your eyes to see what He defines as beauty, not what the world thinks. Walk in the beauty God has given you!
Thanks God! Played (corrected, yet again...)! But being corrected (played) when it comes to these things is one of the best feelings in the world.
Ok...so this scripture (to me) speaks to one specific area in my life. I was roaming on myspace and came across this dude's page (he's my bf's cousin) but what was so amazing to me is that, I believe, he's only 17 and he's so on fire for God. He had verse 9 on his page and that struck a chord within me. First area: Self-esteem. Really...who am I to really question God about what He made and how He did so? He's the master creator and everything He did/ does is good...superior work...of the best quality. Therefore, what does that say about me? This is not a point to get cocky on but God wants each of us to realize how important we are. How when He made us, it was, indeed, good. This point has nothing to do with us but has all to do with WHO HE IS. Isn't that awesome? If He could create a whole universe, do you think He'd wait to get to you to mess up? Of course not! It's simply not in His character to make mistakes or else, He wouldn't be God. So for those of you, like myself, who struggle with this self-esteem thing, you have to learn how to see yourself the way that God sees you--precious. We're His workmanship, We're fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 119), and we're created in Christ Jesus to do good works (Ephesians 2:10). I understand it's a process. Take it one day at a time. Ask God to show you your worth, not for the sake of knowing it, but in order to truly understand how great He is for making someone as unique and different as you. You'd be amazed what He'll show you once you open your eyes to see what He defines as beauty, not what the world thinks. Walk in the beauty God has given you!
Thanks God! Played (corrected, yet again...)! But being corrected (played) when it comes to these things is one of the best feelings in the world.
Monday, January 21, 2008
I don't know why HE loves me...
Just to make this abundantly clear, the HE is no ordinary person. He's God. And as a recurring thought for today: I really and truly can't understand with my infinite mind why in the world does He love me? I mean, if you were the whole Creator of the universe and everything within it, would you even care about each person? Would you know, as the Bible says, the number of hairs on each individual's head? Would you take the time to love and understand each individuals and their nuances? Would you spend your time trying to show each individual how much you love them in a unique way KNOWING that you may be mistreated, ignored, or simply written off many times? Only God would do that. Only God has done that for me. He's the busiest person I know yet He gives me the most time. He's the most lovable person I know yet He loves me more than I can ever imagine and definitely more than I could ever love Him back. He gave me His most precious gift, His Son, so that I might be able to live with Him forever. Now, if that it isn't love, I don't know what is. So back to my original question: Why does He love me? How could He continue to love me inspite of all I've done (or haven't done). It's just His nature. And I'm overjoyed, over love, over Him.
"And He, being full of compassion, forgave their sins and destroyed them not. Yea, many a time turned He His anger away and did not stir up all His wrath. For He remembered that they were but flesh, a wind that passeth away and cometh not again." --Psalm 78:38-39
"I have loved you with an everlasting love. I have drawn you with lovingkindness." --Jeremiah 31:3
Let's reflect the love of God in our love for Him, our love for our temples (our bodies), and our love for each other. God is real. It's time for us to start acting like it.
Phileo love,
Ash
"And He, being full of compassion, forgave their sins and destroyed them not. Yea, many a time turned He His anger away and did not stir up all His wrath. For He remembered that they were but flesh, a wind that passeth away and cometh not again." --Psalm 78:38-39
"I have loved you with an everlasting love. I have drawn you with lovingkindness." --Jeremiah 31:3
Let's reflect the love of God in our love for Him, our love for our temples (our bodies), and our love for each other. God is real. It's time for us to start acting like it.
Phileo love,
Ash
Sunday, January 20, 2008
My Impression of France so far...
I purposely waited to write this blog. I did so simply for the fact that I wanted to get myself used to being here and being somewhat familiar with my surroundings. I wanted to wait until a time when I wasn't homesick every other day (I do miss my family though...sigh). So here it is...
Rouen is a beautiful city. It's classically beautiful though...not so much modernly beautiful. The architecture is simply marvelous. I am actually staying in a place called Mont Saint Aignan, which is a suburb outside of Rouen. It seems like everything is designed so that you do quite a bit of walking which isn't such a bad thing. I need the exercise! Downtown Rouen is full of things to do. There are so many shops and food places and museums. It's definitely cool for tourism. Paris is very busy. The subways looked like NY subways but I haven't really gone to the nice "tourist part of town" yet so my opinion of Paris is a bit biased. I'll blog it once I've seen the Eiffel Tower, Champs Elysees, L'Arc de Triomphe, etc. Good news though: The sale going on right now in the stores are OUTRAGEOUS. 40,50,60,70% off stuff. I'm absolutely loving it! Only until the 2nd week of February though :(
Most of the foods I've tasted have been good. I could live off crepes, paninis, and kebabs (though it wouldn't be very healthy). Many of the meals consist of at least some form of cheese, bread, and wine. The breads are absolutely delightful over here. I have to try to keep myself away from the bakeries.
Classes are cool so far. My schedule is so easy this semester and I thank God for the break. At PSU, I'd be ripping and running by now (which is probably why I stay so worn out during the semesters there). The teachers seem to be pretty nice so far. Then again, we're only going into our 2nd week so we'll see how my opinion changes in a few weeks.
The majority of the French people have been ok towards me as a person who knows little French. I've had my experience with the cashier at the grocery store getting totally pissed at me for not understanding what she was saying. It was my second day in France...take it easy! But as each day goes on, it gets better. Most of the French people I've met have been nice (which is a relief because I heard that they can be a bit mean).
Plans for this week: Classes on Monday and Tuesday; Brussels with Andrea, Diana, and Maggie on Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday. Anything past that for this week, I have no clue.
I believe that in the end, I will look back at this whole semester and not regret a minute of it. And for me...that's a good thing.
Phileo love,
Ash
Rouen is a beautiful city. It's classically beautiful though...not so much modernly beautiful. The architecture is simply marvelous. I am actually staying in a place called Mont Saint Aignan, which is a suburb outside of Rouen. It seems like everything is designed so that you do quite a bit of walking which isn't such a bad thing. I need the exercise! Downtown Rouen is full of things to do. There are so many shops and food places and museums. It's definitely cool for tourism. Paris is very busy. The subways looked like NY subways but I haven't really gone to the nice "tourist part of town" yet so my opinion of Paris is a bit biased. I'll blog it once I've seen the Eiffel Tower, Champs Elysees, L'Arc de Triomphe, etc. Good news though: The sale going on right now in the stores are OUTRAGEOUS. 40,50,60,70% off stuff. I'm absolutely loving it! Only until the 2nd week of February though :(
Most of the foods I've tasted have been good. I could live off crepes, paninis, and kebabs (though it wouldn't be very healthy). Many of the meals consist of at least some form of cheese, bread, and wine. The breads are absolutely delightful over here. I have to try to keep myself away from the bakeries.
Classes are cool so far. My schedule is so easy this semester and I thank God for the break. At PSU, I'd be ripping and running by now (which is probably why I stay so worn out during the semesters there). The teachers seem to be pretty nice so far. Then again, we're only going into our 2nd week so we'll see how my opinion changes in a few weeks.
The majority of the French people have been ok towards me as a person who knows little French. I've had my experience with the cashier at the grocery store getting totally pissed at me for not understanding what she was saying. It was my second day in France...take it easy! But as each day goes on, it gets better. Most of the French people I've met have been nice (which is a relief because I heard that they can be a bit mean).
Plans for this week: Classes on Monday and Tuesday; Brussels with Andrea, Diana, and Maggie on Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday. Anything past that for this week, I have no clue.
I believe that in the end, I will look back at this whole semester and not regret a minute of it. And for me...that's a good thing.
Phileo love,
Ash
It gets hard sometimes....
WAITING.
I had a conversation with a friend the other day that really got me to thinking. As I've mentioned before, I would LOVE to be courted like back in the day...I mean really serious stuff. I want the type of thing that from beginning to end, we both would know it's just right because every step of the relationship would be ordained by God. But, one thing I realize is that in order to get to that, I have to WAIT. One thing I've learned about myself lately is that I'm a pretty impatient person. I loved to consider myself a patient person until I finally really stepped back and looked at this area (among others) of my life. What I discovered is that I'm not patient...AT ALL. I say I want that man, that relationship that God will be pleased with but I'm not willing to wait for it. If the opportunity presented itself today or tomorrow with certain people, I would so jump into it without even consulting God. Now that's backwards. James 1:2-4 (NLT) says, "Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles (trials, testing) come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing." Since perfect is a touchy word in Christianity, I like the word used in the New International Version, mature. So...first thing, the testing. Clearly, I consider this time of waiting a time of testing. I mean, am I wrong to do so? I'm a 20 year old female in college. Living holy isn't the easiest or most popular thing. Sexual purity is old-fashioned. But then there are just those times when, like any human I'm sure, you just want someone to be there. My parents are there but you want someone to BE THERE. My friends are there but I want someone who can BE THERE (when I say hello to the world..lol j/k Jackson Five song). By now, you get what I'm saying. So...next it says that the testing should be considered an opportunity for great joy. Hmm...I can't speak for anyone else but I can remember times when my life decisions have caused me some serious temporary hurt. Nevertheless, I survived it. And before it's all said and done, there might be some other hurts because of my decision but the scripture clearly tells me that it's an opportunity for great joy. WHY? Because by going through the testing, it produces PATIENCE or ENDURANCE. Now, it would be so much easier if I never had the urge to randomly go give myself away to someone or if I never wanted to deeply fall in love with someone I think the world of or if I never looked around me and felt pressured because it seems like everyone is in either love or lust (choose whichever you fall into). Life would be so simple. But MESSAGE: It's not. And because it's not, the Bible tells us that it is an opportunity to build our endurance. To flex our spiritual muscles. The tension caused between the temptation and my will to do God's will makes me stronger. The stronger I get in my faith, the more I am able to combat the temptations as they come one by one. Get it? But remember, it's always a choice I Corinthians 10:12-13 says "If you think you're standing strong, be careful not to fall. The temptations in your life are no different from what others experience. And God is faithful. He will not allow the temptation to be more than what you can stand. When you are tempted, He will show you a way out so that you can endure." Verse 4 starts out by saying "Let it grow." It doesn't sound like a question to me...it's more of a request, demand, or suggestion. Take it for what it's worth. Anyway, the point of the statement is that we're to let patience grow. This means not taking the easy way out. I know, I know....easier said than done but the promise is that when it's fully developed, you will be mature and complete, not lacking anything. WOW. That means that everything you need (wisdom, patience, etc.) will be taken care of once your patience or endurance has grown. What a picture.
So I know it get hard sometimes but it's so much better to just wait on God, friends. Once you come to the conclusion that it's never about you and life should be for Him and Him alone, it will be much easier to wait. The problem is that we live in a society that tells us it's okay to rush into things and we live in a world of instant gratification. But remember the friction you're feeling is a result of the patience and the endurance building up. It's like an athlete....you don't become a good athlete overnight. You workout and practice, practice, practice. Does it feel good at the time? No. But as a friend of mine used to say, "It's a good hurt." because in the end, you build endurance.
Meanwhile, our responsibility is this:"I want you to be free from the concerns of this life. An unmarried person can spend his time doing the Lord's work and thinking how to please Him." --I Corinthians 7:32
It gets hard sometimes ya'll but I'm determined. "..neither will I offer burnt offerings unto the LORD my God of that which doth cost me nothing..." --II Samuel 24:24b. Be that difference!
Phileo love,
Ash B.
I had a conversation with a friend the other day that really got me to thinking. As I've mentioned before, I would LOVE to be courted like back in the day...I mean really serious stuff. I want the type of thing that from beginning to end, we both would know it's just right because every step of the relationship would be ordained by God. But, one thing I realize is that in order to get to that, I have to WAIT. One thing I've learned about myself lately is that I'm a pretty impatient person. I loved to consider myself a patient person until I finally really stepped back and looked at this area (among others) of my life. What I discovered is that I'm not patient...AT ALL. I say I want that man, that relationship that God will be pleased with but I'm not willing to wait for it. If the opportunity presented itself today or tomorrow with certain people, I would so jump into it without even consulting God. Now that's backwards. James 1:2-4 (NLT) says, "Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles (trials, testing) come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing." Since perfect is a touchy word in Christianity, I like the word used in the New International Version, mature. So...first thing, the testing. Clearly, I consider this time of waiting a time of testing. I mean, am I wrong to do so? I'm a 20 year old female in college. Living holy isn't the easiest or most popular thing. Sexual purity is old-fashioned. But then there are just those times when, like any human I'm sure, you just want someone to be there. My parents are there but you want someone to BE THERE. My friends are there but I want someone who can BE THERE (when I say hello to the world..lol j/k Jackson Five song). By now, you get what I'm saying. So...next it says that the testing should be considered an opportunity for great joy. Hmm...I can't speak for anyone else but I can remember times when my life decisions have caused me some serious temporary hurt. Nevertheless, I survived it. And before it's all said and done, there might be some other hurts because of my decision but the scripture clearly tells me that it's an opportunity for great joy. WHY? Because by going through the testing, it produces PATIENCE or ENDURANCE. Now, it would be so much easier if I never had the urge to randomly go give myself away to someone or if I never wanted to deeply fall in love with someone I think the world of or if I never looked around me and felt pressured because it seems like everyone is in either love or lust (choose whichever you fall into). Life would be so simple. But MESSAGE: It's not. And because it's not, the Bible tells us that it is an opportunity to build our endurance. To flex our spiritual muscles. The tension caused between the temptation and my will to do God's will makes me stronger. The stronger I get in my faith, the more I am able to combat the temptations as they come one by one. Get it? But remember, it's always a choice I Corinthians 10:12-13 says "If you think you're standing strong, be careful not to fall. The temptations in your life are no different from what others experience. And God is faithful. He will not allow the temptation to be more than what you can stand. When you are tempted, He will show you a way out so that you can endure." Verse 4 starts out by saying "Let it grow." It doesn't sound like a question to me...it's more of a request, demand, or suggestion. Take it for what it's worth. Anyway, the point of the statement is that we're to let patience grow. This means not taking the easy way out. I know, I know....easier said than done but the promise is that when it's fully developed, you will be mature and complete, not lacking anything. WOW. That means that everything you need (wisdom, patience, etc.) will be taken care of once your patience or endurance has grown. What a picture.
So I know it get hard sometimes but it's so much better to just wait on God, friends. Once you come to the conclusion that it's never about you and life should be for Him and Him alone, it will be much easier to wait. The problem is that we live in a society that tells us it's okay to rush into things and we live in a world of instant gratification. But remember the friction you're feeling is a result of the patience and the endurance building up. It's like an athlete....you don't become a good athlete overnight. You workout and practice, practice, practice. Does it feel good at the time? No. But as a friend of mine used to say, "It's a good hurt." because in the end, you build endurance.
Meanwhile, our responsibility is this:"I want you to be free from the concerns of this life. An unmarried person can spend his time doing the Lord's work and thinking how to please Him." --I Corinthians 7:32
It gets hard sometimes ya'll but I'm determined. "..neither will I offer burnt offerings unto the LORD my God of that which doth cost me nothing..." --II Samuel 24:24b. Be that difference!
Phileo love,
Ash B.
The Beautiful Facade
I was blessed to be able to read an article on crosswalk.com (excellent devotional site for Christians) the other day and I came across an article talking about showing the true you. I clicked on it to see what the author had to say (I can be a bit critical of readings with self-help type overtones) and surprisingly, I found my life story. Let me explain....
The author, like myself, is a pastor's child and for most of his life felt the pressure to be that perfect child, not just for his own sake but (indirectly) for the sake of his father. What he found out as he got older was that what he portrayed in the church and in the community was not the real him. There was so much of his personality and his character that he masked because of the pressure to be. He called it The Beautiful Façade.
I parallel to my own life: I've only been a pastor's kid for 5 years but my dad has been in full-time ministry since I was 9. Prior to that, he was a deacon and a minister. So I've always been a kid to look at from the church's point of view. I worked so hard to just be that perfect girl that younger girls would look up to and that mothers would want their daughters to be. Slowly, it became, what I now identify as, an obsession. I wasn't pretty enough to be America's Next Top PK but I was smart enough to be in Who's Who. I worked so hard to perfect something that simply wasn't and still would mess up. I thank God for my soror Patrice who was the first to really call out what I was dealing with. It was the spirit of pride. I know when most people see PRIDE, they think arrogance. But pride is so multi-faceted as a sin, you can be dealing with it AND NOT EVEN KNOW IT. I was too proud to let who I really am shine forth (flaws and all), I was too proud to let God deal with me on the issue, I was too proud to admit that it had become a problem. My life was one daily masquerade after another. I was so good at one time that I could wear two or three masks at once.
But this is where God steps in: Thank God for small victories. I was able to identify the problem. Now what is the root? Unhealthy ideals about myself and longing for everyone's stamp of approval (when I say everyone, I mean everyone. I wanted your goldfish to like me.) So here's what God showed me...to a certain extent, I am still the Beautiful Façade. I let only a select few see me for who I am and that still is a diluted version. This Beautiful Façade has led me to be reserved, not BOLD. And my self-esteem....under construction. What God is trying to do is break down this barrier, this façade, this heart of stone (Ez. 36:26) so that I may continue on to my destiny in Him.
Why? (well, that's what I asked too). First, BOLDNESS is needed to be an ambassador for Christ (II Cor. 5:17-21). For in order to truly know Christ, you must know Him in all areas (in the fellowship of His suffering, in the power of His resurrection Phil. 3:7-10). You must risk your reputation and rejection for the cause of Christ. Under my façade?? I know I wouldn't (at least not completely). Second, low self-esteem reflects negatively on the creator. Now, I'm convicted writing this and I know it's a work in progress so bare with me. God created us...in His image. We are creator's originals, each of us. Me not liking my Creator's original is not only blatantly telling God I don't like what He's made but to the unbeliever, what type of image does that cast of God? Does it say "Come to Jesus...He can do anything except for make you like yourself"?? OR What does it do to scriptures like Psalm 139, which specifically speaks to your self-esteem? It's impossible to have a completely healthy image of God without having a healthy image of yourself. (this is not a segway into Conceit 101). Just know that God made you beautiful/handsome...and walk in that beauty (not waddle and immerse yourself, just walk. Be easy.) My third and final point....Being you. Look friend...if God didn't think He made something good when He made you, He obviously wouldn't have done so. Hiding behind people's perceptions and expectations shows your commitment to them and your lack of commitment to what God thinks. RED FLAG: YOU'RE A PEOPLE PLEASER. Before you get mad, it takes one to know one. I'm there with you. Our lives should radiate the love of God through our actions, thoughts, and words. If your personality and character are within those contexts, LIVE, MY BROTHER, LIVE! God doesn't say that we should all be quiet, or all be loud, or all be funny. That would be pretty boring and God is a pretty creative God. I mean who's that creative to make you the only you? None before you and none after you. My point exactly.
Whatever you do, please don't find yourself in my shoes with a façade that God has to break through just to get to you. He loves, loves, loves you and thinks the whole world of you. Jeremiah 31:3 says, "I have loved you with an everlasting love. I have drawn you with lovingkindness." A lot of times we think we're ready to know our destiny and we're ready to ministry and all God wants from us that moment is to take us back to the basics.
...Now it'll be a trip if God brought me all the way to France to see all this...but I guess it's over here where my ears aren't so clogged with the hustle and bustle and I can clearly distinguish between His voice and my whisper...
Phileo Love ya'll,
Ash
The author, like myself, is a pastor's child and for most of his life felt the pressure to be that perfect child, not just for his own sake but (indirectly) for the sake of his father. What he found out as he got older was that what he portrayed in the church and in the community was not the real him. There was so much of his personality and his character that he masked because of the pressure to be. He called it The Beautiful Façade.
I parallel to my own life: I've only been a pastor's kid for 5 years but my dad has been in full-time ministry since I was 9. Prior to that, he was a deacon and a minister. So I've always been a kid to look at from the church's point of view. I worked so hard to just be that perfect girl that younger girls would look up to and that mothers would want their daughters to be. Slowly, it became, what I now identify as, an obsession. I wasn't pretty enough to be America's Next Top PK but I was smart enough to be in Who's Who. I worked so hard to perfect something that simply wasn't and still would mess up. I thank God for my soror Patrice who was the first to really call out what I was dealing with. It was the spirit of pride. I know when most people see PRIDE, they think arrogance. But pride is so multi-faceted as a sin, you can be dealing with it AND NOT EVEN KNOW IT. I was too proud to let who I really am shine forth (flaws and all), I was too proud to let God deal with me on the issue, I was too proud to admit that it had become a problem. My life was one daily masquerade after another. I was so good at one time that I could wear two or three masks at once.
But this is where God steps in: Thank God for small victories. I was able to identify the problem. Now what is the root? Unhealthy ideals about myself and longing for everyone's stamp of approval (when I say everyone, I mean everyone. I wanted your goldfish to like me.) So here's what God showed me...to a certain extent, I am still the Beautiful Façade. I let only a select few see me for who I am and that still is a diluted version. This Beautiful Façade has led me to be reserved, not BOLD. And my self-esteem....under construction. What God is trying to do is break down this barrier, this façade, this heart of stone (Ez. 36:26) so that I may continue on to my destiny in Him.
Why? (well, that's what I asked too). First, BOLDNESS is needed to be an ambassador for Christ (II Cor. 5:17-21). For in order to truly know Christ, you must know Him in all areas (in the fellowship of His suffering, in the power of His resurrection Phil. 3:7-10). You must risk your reputation and rejection for the cause of Christ. Under my façade?? I know I wouldn't (at least not completely). Second, low self-esteem reflects negatively on the creator. Now, I'm convicted writing this and I know it's a work in progress so bare with me. God created us...in His image. We are creator's originals, each of us. Me not liking my Creator's original is not only blatantly telling God I don't like what He's made but to the unbeliever, what type of image does that cast of God? Does it say "Come to Jesus...He can do anything except for make you like yourself"?? OR What does it do to scriptures like Psalm 139, which specifically speaks to your self-esteem? It's impossible to have a completely healthy image of God without having a healthy image of yourself. (this is not a segway into Conceit 101). Just know that God made you beautiful/handsome...and walk in that beauty (not waddle and immerse yourself, just walk. Be easy.) My third and final point....Being you. Look friend...if God didn't think He made something good when He made you, He obviously wouldn't have done so. Hiding behind people's perceptions and expectations shows your commitment to them and your lack of commitment to what God thinks. RED FLAG: YOU'RE A PEOPLE PLEASER. Before you get mad, it takes one to know one. I'm there with you. Our lives should radiate the love of God through our actions, thoughts, and words. If your personality and character are within those contexts, LIVE, MY BROTHER, LIVE! God doesn't say that we should all be quiet, or all be loud, or all be funny. That would be pretty boring and God is a pretty creative God. I mean who's that creative to make you the only you? None before you and none after you. My point exactly.
Whatever you do, please don't find yourself in my shoes with a façade that God has to break through just to get to you. He loves, loves, loves you and thinks the whole world of you. Jeremiah 31:3 says, "I have loved you with an everlasting love. I have drawn you with lovingkindness." A lot of times we think we're ready to know our destiny and we're ready to ministry and all God wants from us that moment is to take us back to the basics.
...Now it'll be a trip if God brought me all the way to France to see all this...but I guess it's over here where my ears aren't so clogged with the hustle and bustle and I can clearly distinguish between His voice and my whisper...
Phileo Love ya'll,
Ash
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
